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Love Is ..... so many different things to so many different people and today's post is a very personal one.

I "may" have mentioned that there was an engagement in the autumn of last year. An engagement that according to everyone else was not unexpected as we have been together for years and have always talked about getting married. But THAT proposal was a moment, one of those defining moments that changes everything.

He planned it over and over but in the end, knowing I am such a control freak, he unplanned it and let me plan a "regular" date night out, so I had no inclination of what was to come. Apparently the restaurant did as champagne arrived swiftly after he proposed!

That moment mattered.

The fact that he wanted to surprise me.

That he undertook the difficult task of selecting a ring, without me being there.

The fact that he asked my Dad beforehand.

This all matters.

But more than that, this single moment had a butterfly effect.

His niece has never been a bridesmaid before, our wedding has filled her with so much excitement. 

He asked his brother to be Best Man and I have never seen them so close.

Our wedding plans have shown the true strength of some amazing friendships.

My godson is thrilled at the thought of being an usher ...... and going out for the day to try on suits.

Oh .... and I get to see my other half in a kilt! (that will be a moment to behold)

I have to admit that as I get older, life and love isn't about the big gestures but the collection of the little things. This single moment (and let's be honest it was a pretty big moment) but it set in motion a series of little things, other moments that mattered to me and to those closest.

That is what Love did.

This is my entry in to the Lloyds bank Moments that Mattered over at Emmaand3

Image courtesy of Idea go / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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Today's post is from the lovely Chantelle who blogs at www.mamamummymum.co.uk 

Love is this invisible feeling.

A feeling that somehow manages to bind us to others. 

I always thought I knew what love really felt like.

From my first crush.

To my first boyfriend.

Especially when I met my now husband.

I was wrong every time.

I never knew what it truly felt like.

Just how strong this invisible feeling could be.

Not until I had children.

One moment.

One Look.

That's all it took.

Looking into each of my children's eyes for the first time.

I felt it. 

I mean really felt it.

Unconditional love.

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Last year I started a Love Is ..... series of posts with contributions from some amazing bloggers. Love means something different to everyone and to start us this year, is the beautiful Kelly Innes.

Things have been difficult for me in the past few weeks. I have been low, frustrated by my relationship with DH, which felt like it was at an impasse. I have cried and cried and wondered and hypothesised and felt very alone. I read a post at Mummy From the Heart with suggestions and thoughts on what makes a good marriage. It made me feel like everyone else was getting it right and I was not.

So I did what you should always do in these situations and I called one of my best buddies. And she did what friends should always do in these situations: she listened. She didn’t judge, or come rushing to my defence. She heard me. Which gave me an opportunity to listen to me too.

And I realised, when I listened to my thoughts articulated, that I was being rather selfish. Yes, DH sometimes gets trapped in his own world, has conversations in his head with me so often that he forgets to actually have them out loud, but that is the way he has always been. He is still the man that I fell in love with. 

And so I watched him. And I saw him working so hard, saw him juggling the manifold responsibilities of supporting a family and a hefty workload and adoring his daughters. His heart, his love, is in all the little things he does that makes our family function. I have always admired that in him.

Then I listened to him: to the intricacies of the work that is keeping him up until midnight and waking him at 5am. I listened to the problems, the car issues, the falling trees, the decisions he is currently weighing up. 

And I saw the man I fell in love with doing all these things for me. And not complaining at all.

And I fell in love with him once more. 

 Kelly is the face behind the vintage silhouette at Domestic Goddesque, is part of The Motherhood, and is a Contributing Editor at BritMums. She has recently moved beyond the fringes of Greater London to the Kent countryside (though still within eyeline of the M25) and has added a few chickens to the family menagerie. Her day is spent chauffeuring children, learning how to cook with an Aga and encouraging the hens to lay eggs and trying not confuse the three. She is mother to two absurdly photogenic girls, wife to her beloved DH and master to the Wonder Hound. She drinks a lot of coffee and spends time on social media to make up for the fact that she doesn’t get out much. You can find Domestic Goddesque on Twitter,Facebook, Google +, Pinterest and Instagram. Do stop by and say hello!

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I talk a lot about my girls growing up but I never really think about them growing old. It is inevitable obviously and I can't imagine not being here to share in their own children and grandchildren. Age comes to us all and with my own Grandmother turning 89 next month and a good friend's mother in law going into a home, being conscious of the care available is something I am becoming more aware of.

In-home care

It is interesting to learn that huge changes are arising for anyone involved with in-home care. Such changes are in place due to various causes, including altering population demographics, new healthcare regulations and the ever-changing and uncertain economic times.

With over 10,000 people turning 65 everyday (this is an amazing figure), more and more are choosing to retire. New trends indicate that a large proportion of the elderly population are choosing to indulge in assisted living as opposed to retiring in a home. 

Due to this factor alone, more expertise is being applied to this area, meaning there is now a growing need for individuals to be trained on this.

Independence 

Instead of migrating to a home by the sea, elderly retirees are choosing to live out their later years in thriving cities, often in assisted living accommodation. Thankfully, due to demand, a number of retirement villages are popping up left, right and centre. Many of these homes boast the likes of in-house help, curved stairlifts and on-site communities. Living in such accommodation allows the older generation to worry less about maintenance responsibilities and more about living life to the full.

It’s also a great option for those who wish to remain independent whilst having access to help when they need it. This is also a great way to free up a little collateral, which can then be put towards the likes of travel, hobbies and lifestyle changes. (My Grandmother has more holidays than anyone I know!!)

Alternative therapies 

It’s no secret that people are living longer in this day and age and this is possible due to an ever-expanding list of alternative therapies. From yoga to video games to green living, seniors are now embracing a variety of diverse therapies as opposed to more traditional retirement rules. I am a huge fan of Reiki and looking after both the mind and the body is more important than ever, especially for seniors.

Accepting new technologies is certainly one way to keep the mind active, whilst indulging in various workout classes is a great way for the elderly to stay in shape whilst allowing retirees to meet new people, learn new skills and make new friends. We bought my Grandmother a tablet last year, so that she could email us and relatives in Austrailia but a year on, she is not quite confident with it so a class would be great for her.

Looking further afield

A number of elderly individuals are now looking to retire in homes further afield. The reason for this – a less costly service that still provides residents with a high quality of living.  

This is a change set to become even more apparent in 2014, especially with the way in which the economic climate stands. Certain venues abroad are able to cater to those with family members who suffer from the likes of Alzheimer’s and dementia, allowing them with access to the professional care they deserve. 

Age comes to us all but for me, I just hope that it also brings wisdom (!!) and a retirement home by the sea!

Disclaimer : This post is brought to you in association with Stannah Stairlifts but all elderly relatives with email troubles are our own!