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Swimming is a big thing in our family (and blog) and my girls love the water (we are on a Lilypad after all), so as it gets colder and wetter outside, we have started a new term in the slightly warmer water in the pool.

I remember having to literally drag my eldest to swimming lessons, although her passive personality could be eventually convinced but this week she has been doing her distance badges and it seems like a million years ago that she was refusing to go. On the flip side, the little one has returned to her Water Babies swimming lesson and as much as she loves the water, she has been expressing her strong personality and choice regarding which activities she undertakes. (going under the water was apparently off her agenda this week).

My eldest has decided that she is going to go to her swimming lessons in a bikini of late and whilst this may not be my swimming attire of choice for her, I am secretly pleased that she is getting some use out of it (and I don't need to buy yet another swimming costume).

The little one wears her Water Babies wet suit, which not only keeps her warm in the water but she looks super cute in it too. I did wonder as the winter draws in whether I could get away with buying one of these

womens wet suits

It made me think about when we become conscious of our attire or is it more conscious of our body? My eldest is really beginning to get into fashion (someone please help me) and those that know me, know that I LOVE fashion but there is no way I would go into our local swimming pool in a bikini! Is that my own insecurities or is that society?

Should I be wrapping myself up in a (nice warm) wet suit or should I be more like my daughter and wear a bikini just because I love it??

What do you think?

Disclosure: This post is brought to you in association with Eureka Cycle Sports but all swimming and fashion dillema's are our own!

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The Family Rules, do your family have them? I don't mean those gorgeous wall prints that you can buy that have a fabulous list of things to live by but I mean the actual ones that work in your family? You "may" have heard recently that there was a marriage proposal on the Lilypad and the "rules" are for marriage as well as for children, so here is what works in our house.

Treat each other with respect. No hurting anyone’s feelings (no yelling, putdowns, or name calling). No hurting anyone’s body (no hitting, pushing, or kicking). Ask permission to borrow things, don't just take them. The Man on the Pad always believes that I should be treated with the same respect as he gave me on our first date, which thankfully means no head holding under the duvet covers! (I shall not say anymore)

Put yourself in my place. This is a particular favourite of the Man on the Pad, whereby he stands by the ethos that if he thinks I would not like what he is doing, he doesn't do it. (I love this one) We encourage this with the children too.

Pick up after yourself - this is a work in progress.

Be generous. Not always with money but with your energy, time and consideration. (although I am never going to turn down a cartier watch)

Apologise and admit when you are wrong. Its not the easy choice but we all have to take responsibility for our behavior by creating a rule about how to respond if they’ve hurt someone. 

Forgive. There is alot to be said for letting go. A grudge only continues to hurt you.

Tell the truth. Children can’t tell the difference between “white lies” and other lies so if you’re going to stress the importance of honesty, you’ll need to show them that you’re honest too. (Not sure where the land lies about Father Christmas on this one though)

Be silly once in a while. Don’t take yourself too seriously. Laugh. Alot. They say that Laughter is the best medicine and laughter lines are way better than frown ones!

Be there. Give your family not only your time, but your attention. Work and life can get in the way but take time to be there completely when you are with them.  

With your children and your partner. Love the good things, see the best bits and FALL IN LOVE OVER and OVER and OVER again.

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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I was once that smug mother, you know the type, the one who has the "perfect" child, who sleeps through the night, hits all her milestones and left me thinking I had it all under control. I may have confessed this before but apparently this had nothing to do with my parenting and more to do with her placid and compliant nature. My youngest daughter came into our lives to remind me that I am a normal mum (who apparently likes sleep much more than she does) but I need to deal with her behaviour in a way that is not normal for my control freak like nature.

My youngest daughter is what some would call "spirited" and last week I used the naughty step for the first time. Unfortunately it wasn't just one time. She even seemed proud to tell Daddy when he got home from work. She understood that she was sitting there because she had been naughty but I am not sure it is an effective technique for her. She is a character and I don't want to crush her spirit but she also needs to know that a temper tantrum is not the way to solve her frustration.

I asked some fellow mums what they did to discipline and encourage their toddlers and they came back with some really interesting suggestions.

Walk & Talk

Becky from Baby Budgeting said "It is really really hard for spirited children to sit still and process things as they often will just feel resentment at being 'contained' I think a walk and talk works better with their energy...guidance and support to achieve what you want them to do rather than isolation (as it can feel like punishment). Thinking helps calm an emotional/angry child too (medically proven!) so getting them to count/read/do simple maths allows the chemicals to stop racing. Consequences (if necessary )can always come later I think".

Time Out

Helen from Kiddycharts said "We called it "time out" as naughty was a word I would rather avoid using. Time in their room works, I usually let them calm down and then we have a cuddle and a chat. The reason for going usually means someone has been a little bit aggressive, shall we say, and needs time away from the situation to calm down"

Counting

Penny from Alexander Residence suggested counting. "For some reason counting worked, I have no idea what he thought would happen when I got to 5 but it seemed to have the desired effect"

Naughty Box

I was a little worried that Kelly from Domestic Goddesque was going to suggest putting the toddler in the box but actually love her suggestion. She said "I developed the Naughty Box into which my daughter's favourite toy of the day must be put if she trangresses massively".

I love some of these ideas and will be trying them over the next few weeks in the hope that we can avoid Christmas Temper Tantrums.

This won't be the first blog post on those Toddler Tantrums and I have more fabulous suggestions to share and try. But for now, it seems that I am the one wearing out the naughty step. I was sitting on the stairs the other day and the little one looked at me and said "you been naughty mommy?"

She is just too darn cute for me to be cross for long!

Image courtesy of imagerymajestic at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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In the UK, he is Father Christmas, the US seem to prefer Santa, while in Poland he is Swiety Mikolaj but wherever you are in the world, children always want to send him their Christmas lists! My eldest daughter considers her list very carefully and this is the list from last year ....

Some of it is barely legible and some of it is cheeky and I have a friend who has spent the last 12 months trying to find a gold reindeer for her! (you watch, it won't be on this years list!) 

I love the innocence of the Christmas list and how when my daughter was talking about some toys she had seen advertised, I happened to comment that they were very expensive. She simply turned and looked at me with a little confusion and said "but mummy, Father Christmas will just get the elves to make it" ....... I forgot that part clearly!

Writing a list is part of the magic of Christmas for our children and having bought stationary in the past, I was delighted to find these FREE Letter to Santa downloads from Vertbaudet. There are three different options but I particularly like the Pile of Presents download that the girls can colour in too!

I am a huge fan of Vertbaudet, with parcels arriving regularly (shhhh, just don't tell the man on the pad) and not having to spend money on Christmas stationary this year means there is more money to spend on clothes and gifts!

That works for me!